


Creative Liberties

by DGCatAniSiri



Category: Gossip Girl
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 08:09:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19058674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DGCatAniSiri/pseuds/DGCatAniSiri
Summary: Dan lets Nate read a new story he's written.





	Creative Liberties

“You’re really asking me?”

“Well, why wouldn’t I?”

“I don’t know, you’re just... always protective of your writing. You only let like actual published writers read your work or something.”

“Well... This time, I’d like to hear from someone who isn’t published.”

Nate couldn’t help but be touched by the trust that Dan was showing him, had pretty much invited him to the loft just to do. His writing was something that he kept very much to himself, refusing to let others touch. Hell, he didn’t think that anyone else had ever even touched Dan’s laptop, that was how protective he was of his work.

“I mean, this isn’t the same novel I’d been working on. I... I don’t know, I kinda hit a wall there, started something else, and... It spiraled out, and made itself... I don’t know, it just seemed to click.”

Nate couldn’t resist a little teasing. “What, I’m not reading about ‘Charlie Trout’?”

That made Dan scowl, though he understood that the teasing was in good fun. “Yeah, okay, so I suck at names. You do better.”

“I think anything is better than “Trout.” Even just going with something common like “Smith.”” 

“I immediately regret this decision...” Dan muttered, though he hadn’t snatched back the pages he’d printed off from Nate’s reach, so he was clearly willing to take at least a little ribbing. 

Still, Nate figured he was probably still pushing his luck if he made any more comments about Dan’s ability to name his characters. Or at least “Charlie Trout” – who knew what new names awaited him in what he was asking Nate to look at? If there was anything worse, Nate didn’t want to have run out all his goodwill on that front. Or the jokes. He definitely needed to save up for those jokes.

So he offered a smile, a peace offering, and picked up the printed pages, still bracing himself for the worst.

It wasn’t exactly Shakespeare, but it wasn’t bad. Nate would be the first to acknowledge that he was no literary critic, but he didn’t think it was bad. Granted, that meant that he also wasn’t really all that much of an expert on what made a good book, but...

The main character was Blake, who was, to Nate’s lack of surprise, something of an outsider. Nate had been picking up a theme, considering what he knew of Dan’s other novel. Considering he knew that Dan had always felt that way back at Constance... Yeah, not really surprising, all things considered. Nate had to wonder if Dan took the whole concept of “write what you know” a little too literally...

Blake was, however, opposite to Dan himself, in that he was the child of wealth, his parents being old money, but he had the values and sensibilities of someone more... down to earth. The story started with him being caught between two girls – best friends, in fact. 

Nate quickly got the sense that Meredith – or Mere, as everyone called her – and Katrina were thinly veiled variations of Blair and Serena. Dan REALLY needed to get better about this habit of just changing the names some to create his characters. At the least, maybe not pick names that rhymed with the names of the actual people who he was making them into. And not make it so transparently who these characters were supposed to be reflections of. 

Blake’s companions in this were the lecherous Chester Pike (Nate offered points for the more obscure fish for this variant of Chuck Bass), and Dave Hillard. 

Nate had two thoughts almost simultaneously. First, he had to wonder why it was that Dan seemed so willing to be more creative with the names of characters based on himself than those around him. The second...

“Wait. Is Blake supposed to be me?”

Dan blushed. Really, truly blushed. Even rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly at being called out like this. “Uh... maybe?”

Nate smiled, trying to put Dan at ease. “Hey, it’s fine. Isn’t this what people become friends with writers for, to get immortalized like this?”

“You’re assuming that I publish this...” Dan muttered, though he sounded relieved that Nate didn’t hate him for making him the main character. Though there still seemed to be a hint of apprehension in Dan’s stance, as if he were waiting for another shoe to drop.

That apprehension he was picking up on made Nate wonder what horrible fate might befall his alter ego before he reached the ending.

It went on for a while, with Blake being pulled between Mere and Katrina, Chester suggesting that he just use and discard them (Dan’s version of Chuck was really not that flattering, but Nate also couldn’t exactly argue too much with the depiction when he compared it to Chuck Bass at his Chuck Bass-iest, which, Nate remembered, Dan had been on the receiving end of the worst of Chuck Bass more than once, so, really, it was probably as fair a depiction as he’d ever get), and Dave just offering moral support through it all.

Then came the ending, and... 

“Wait, did Blake and Dave just kiss?” Nate needed a minute to reboot, reconsider what he’d just read through.

The furious blush on Dan’s face was confirmation that, yes, words still had meaning, and these words in this order had the meaning Nate thought they did. “Uh... yeah. That, uh... That managed to... happen.” 

“’Managed to happen’?” Nate echoed, sounding skeptical. Not that he was angry or anything – it was fiction, even if it was based on actual people. And it’s not like he thought it was something to be upset about period. It said more about the person trying to use it as an insult than the person it was directed to. And Nate knew that Dan didn’t consider it an insult. 

Dan awkwardly cleared his throat, trying to figure out how to salvage anything from the situation. “I just... while I was writing it, it... it seemed like it fit. That... Blake and Dave should... get together.”

Glancing back to the last remaining unread pages – it was a short story, at least at this point, Nate had seen several points where he figured Dan would go back in and expand if this became his next big project – Nate considered. On the one hand, he’d missed anything going on between the two characters. On the other... He hadn’t expected it. He’d assumed that Dan was writing another story about himself. But, as he skimmed back through the pages he’d read, now that he knew he had to reconsider his expectations... There had been something, he realized. Something that had been an undercurrent that just... had slid past him, while he let his expectations of Dan lead him to a conclusion.

Then he paused.

His expectations of Dan.

“Wait a second. Dan... Is there something you’re trying to tell me with this?”

“What? I... Ah... You...” Between the hemming and hawing and the furious blushing, Nate had a hard time thinking that there was anything other than a subconscious – or entirely conscious – message.

“I mean, you write this story about characters who are... pretty clearly us... and then they end up getting together?” At least, he was assuming – Blake had been pretty receptive of Dave’s kiss, after all, and it ended the whole business of the love triangle between Mere and Katrina – the description of the kiss pretty clearly said that Blake found it put the girls’ efforts to shame... Yeah, Dan had written these two characters to get together. “What am I supposed to think, other than you clearly have something you’ve been neglecting to tell me.”

Somehow, despite sitting in the middle of a sofa, Dan looked like he was cornered and unable to flee. “I, uh...” He took another moment, finally just admitting defeat. “Yeah. I... I guess there’s... there’s maybe some subtext in there that... Is this... a problem?”

That was the real question, wasn’t it. Nate had always just assumed that Dan was straight, what with the whole thing with Serena, that seemingly perpetual on-and-off, back-and-forth, up-and-down, will-they-won’t-they business... Which, he realized, was probably part of the point – Serena was the unattainable, the one who lived in the images and wasn’t going to be able to survive coming down to the mortal level, which is why the relationship had just yo-yo’ed over the last few years. It wasn’t something that really held together once it approached the level where both parties were just human. 

And Dan’s relationship with Nate... Nate had been the one who least bought into the “rules” of the Upper East Side’s social circles. He’d even befriended the outsider at Constance, the kid who “didn’t belong” because he happened to be from the areas of town that weren’t the domain of the wealthy of the Upper East Side. He’d fallen into the orbit of Nate and his friends, and... really, with all the drama that came about with the various bouts of Upper East Side drama, particularly when one was even remotely in the orbit of Blair Waldorf, Serena van der Woodsen, and Chuck Bass, he’d had every reason to bail.

Sure, there’d been Serena, but... Well, having been invested in that disaster once before, Nate could admit that Serena probably needed to work out things for herself before she could have a healthy and lasting romantic relationship. And... well, this story certainly said that Dan had gotten over her and was dealing with new feelings.

So... Nate had to figure out his feelings. Because Dan was looking at him pretty expectantly. And whether or not Nate felt anything for Dan in the same way he did, it was hard to see his friend so clearly scared of what the answer to his question would be. 

And... wow. He really hated that fear being there. It actually almost hurt him to see Dan – this great guy, someone who’d managed to hold together through some rather incredible crap over the years, someone who had never let the damage that the people of the Upper East Side had tried to inflict on him for daring to be of a lower tax bracket stop him from just trying to make his way in that orbit...

So. Maybe Nate’s feelings for Dan weren’t as platonic as he’d always thought.

If he was reconsidering how he’d expected the story that Dan had written with his alter ego to play out, maybe he ought to reconsider how to approach the real life version of things between him and Dan. Nate had spent a lot of time in his life acting as expected, even after he’d broken up with Blair, despite how they’d been seen as “the” couple of the Upper East Side. Even after that, his family had been pressing him, pushing for him to keep being “the good one.” Even if they weren’t Nate had a good example to set, just to set the tabloid gossip at ease, make the family dinners and discussions bearable by giving them something to praise.

And, really, that wasn’t what he wanted out of his life. He knew he depended on his family’s money, because who on the Upper East Side didn’t in some way, even Dan was living off his Dad’s generosity in letting him live in the loft that the Humphrey’s had lived in for years, all alone and rent-free, while Rufus and Lily lived in their own place. But he didn’t want to live his life by his families... not even expectations, but demands.

And they would demand he marry some nice girl at some point. If not Blair, maybe Serena – god knows they’d certainly had a dance going on, that dance being why he’d decided that there needed to be a distance between them for a while, just so he could live a life for him, not for the relationship with the ladies at the top of the Upper East Side’s food chain. If neither of them... the family would certainly have eventually warmed to Jenny Humphrey, especially if it came to her or her brother.

But... Nate couldn’t picture a future with Jenny, who’d abandoned the Upper East Side and its corrupting influence, and probably for the best. The other girls were too prone to the same petty backstabbing and drama that he’d never had an interest in. 

Dan... Dan was, by his own admission, the outsider to all of it. And he’d made efforts to get in, of course. But if he was writing this kind of story, if he wanted to give up the chase of Serena – maybe even the chase of the glory of being accepted by those who could never see him as a person worth anything...

Well, Nate had always thought Dan had value. And, it seemed, maybe he valued Dan far more than he’d ever thought before.

Value... No. He didn’t like that term. Not given how much of the Upper East Side revolved around money, revolved around things. Dan wasn’t some cherished prize possession that he wanted to own. Dan was a person, a unique individual whose worth wasn’t in a dollar amount. Being friends with Dan had kept Nate grounded – Dan’s family had given him a window into a better life than the polite fiction and façade that the Archibald’s had always presented to the world, and... 

Yeah. Nate wanted to have that in his life. He wanted DAN in his life. And if that meant that it called for more than just friendship, if he wanted to be with Dan... 

He could see that, actually. And, if the rest of his family had a problem with it, if they wanted the fiction instead of his happiness... Well, he’d take one Dan Humphrey over a family of Archibald’s anyday.

Nate let out a long breath. “Okay. Truth is, I hadn’t thought about it before. You know? It’s one of those things, it’s just... not expected.” The Upper East Side was all about the old money traditions. Dan might be the outsider to those circles, but that gave him more than enough room to actually be able to realize how much the whole Upper East Side system was dysfunctional when it actually even worked. 

Before Nate could go on, he saw Dan flinch, as if he’d gotten bad news he’d expected. “Yeah. Yeah, I figured that, I just-”

As Dan started to get up – where he’d go, Nate didn’t know, since they were in his loft in the first place – Nate grabbed his arm. “Hey, Dan. Let me finish, okay?” he said, trying to give Dan a reassuring smile.

Dan didn’t look all that reassured, but he sat back down. Nate would take his victory. “I hadn’t thought about it before. But I’m thinking about it now. And... I know for sure there are worse things. So... maybe I’d be willing to do more than think about it.”

“Maybe?” Dan’s voice almost managed to squeak at the thought – it wasn’t a dream, it was actually really happening that Nate might want to have something with him, the words actually coming out of Nate’s mouth... Dan cleared his throat. “Uh... Maybe, huh?” he said, trying to sound smooth. He was failing miserably.

Somehow, now that Nate had realized that it was something that he could easily fall in love with. 

He flashed a smile. “Yeah. Maybe.” 

Then he leaned over, placed a hand on Dan’s cheek, unconsciously rubbing at his cheekbone, and leaned in for a kiss.

He’d only expected it to be a short, sweet kiss. But it was like pressing their lips together was like breaking open a dam, allowing feelings they both hadn’t even known had been building to go free. When they finally pulled apart for air, he was fully in Dan’s lap, his one hand still cradling Dan’s face, the other leaning against the wall. They were both flushed, but, Nate noticed, Dan seemed so blissed out that his brain had short-circuited.

That made him rather proud, actually.

It took a moment for Dan to regain coherence. “That... That was definitely better than Blake and Dave’s kiss.”

“Guess you’re gonna have to do a few edits.”

“Yeah,” Dan nodded. His hands were now on Nate’s waist, and he slipped his thumbs under Nate’s shirt, gently rubbing at the skin there. He didn’t sound like he was thinking of doing any writing in the near future, though. “Uh... you know... If I’m gonna write anything more about Blake and Dave... I think I’m gonna need some more, uh... inspiration.”

It was ridiculous. It was cheesy. It was silly at its kindest.

And it made Nate laugh.

“I think I can certainly help... inspire a few more ideas...” he murmured. And, before Dan could ask any kind of follow up of what Nate might have in mind, Nate leaned back down, catching Dan’s lips in another long, thorough kiss.

There wasn’t much writing – or talking – going on for a while in the loft.

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one who rolled their eyes every damn time Dan referred to "Charlie Trout" with a straight face. Seriously man. Come up with better aliases for your carbon copy characters. Also, you should probably stop writing carbon copy characters.


End file.
